And this is why inner work is so important. How can you decide what is projecting and what is actual advice if you do not know your deepest desires and passion :) but we are so tangled inside. It takes a lot of work :) great post
Not all advice is wisdom. Sometimes it’s just someone handing you their unhealed story.
Projection speaks from unresolved emotion. Advice speaks from integrated experience. The difference isn’t in how confident it sounds, it’s in how self aware it is.
That’s why introspection matters. If you don’t know your own wounds, fears, and patterns then you’ll mistake someone else’s baggage for guidance. Self awareness is the filter.
Because “for your own good” can be love ... or it can be someone handing you their own fear and calling it wisdom. And the way you framed it as “real care leaves you more you” ... not smaller, not embarrassed, not scrambled ... that’s such a good check.
Also the line about how projection is real but avoidance is real too ... YES. Sometimes we call it projection because we don’t want to look in the mirror. The pause between “maybe they’re right” and “maybe they’re not” is where the actual growth happens.
You really captured what I was trying to get at :’) especially how real care 'leaves you more you' instead of making you feel smaller. And exactly how that pause between 'maybe they're right' and 'maybe they're not' is everything! It's so much easier to either absorb everything or dismiss everything than to sit in that uncomfortable space where actual discernment happens.
Thank you for confirming that the nuance actually came through. After agonizing over this piece for hours, this brought warmth to my stressed-out little heart 🫶🏼
And this is why inner work is so important. How can you decide what is projecting and what is actual advice if you do not know your deepest desires and passion :) but we are so tangled inside. It takes a lot of work :) great post
yes!! The inner work is the foundation. It's hard to know what's projection when you don't know yourself yet. Appreciate you reading, Diana :)
Not all advice is wisdom. Sometimes it’s just someone handing you their unhealed story.
Projection speaks from unresolved emotion. Advice speaks from integrated experience. The difference isn’t in how confident it sounds, it’s in how self aware it is.
That’s why introspection matters. If you don’t know your own wounds, fears, and patterns then you’ll mistake someone else’s baggage for guidance. Self awareness is the filter.
This! 'Projection speaks from unresolved emotion. Advice speaks from integrated experience.' That's such a clear way to put it. 🤌🏽
Self awareness IS the filter.
Oof I really liked this.
Because “for your own good” can be love ... or it can be someone handing you their own fear and calling it wisdom. And the way you framed it as “real care leaves you more you” ... not smaller, not embarrassed, not scrambled ... that’s such a good check.
Also the line about how projection is real but avoidance is real too ... YES. Sometimes we call it projection because we don’t want to look in the mirror. The pause between “maybe they’re right” and “maybe they’re not” is where the actual growth happens.
Nannieee!
You really captured what I was trying to get at :’) especially how real care 'leaves you more you' instead of making you feel smaller. And exactly how that pause between 'maybe they're right' and 'maybe they're not' is everything! It's so much easier to either absorb everything or dismiss everything than to sit in that uncomfortable space where actual discernment happens.
Thank you for confirming that the nuance actually came through. After agonizing over this piece for hours, this brought warmth to my stressed-out little heart 🫶🏼